Welcome unbelievers. You can call me Robo-Warrior. Now there are a lot of jive-ass punks out there who think they know the truth. Blogging amateurs! I’m here to tell you, they have no idea.

The Big Nothing in Wisconsin

You nimrods just wasted my week off! After I read your little “report” on supposed UFO sightings in the cheesey state, I decided to take a little look-see for myself.

And what did I find, pray tell?  Not a thing.  Nothing.  NOTHING!  No signs of atmospheric re-entry, no debris from aerodynamic heat shielding, no landing depressions, no footprints — just a bunch of cheeseheads who saw some lights in the sky.  What a mystery.  I mean,  lights in the sky?  What could that possibly BE??  Maybe we’ll never know.  Morons.

I was willing to let it slide as amateur hour until i saw your “exclusive” - meh, more fiction!

So forget all this “secret code” hoopla.  There’s no AI calling.  And if it ever does, it’s not for you.  Let me answer it.

I only get one week off, you know!

(P.S. They do make some good gouda up there.  If you ever get a chance to visit, I highly recommend it.)

14 Comments on this article

  1. Methusalen says:

    I’m sorry the week’s vacation was for naught Robo-Warrior. I was hoping these was something to the report. I hadn’t heard anything on the news about the event, so I didin’t think there was much to it myself; nor did I see anything out of the ordinary since I read the bit on TRED.

    I’m glad to hear that there’s someone out there passionate enough about their work to trek across the country to look for the TRUTH! -Unlike some others who just accept things at face value… Fiction indeed! I’ve been to Fond Du Lac, Wi before to check out some stories I’d heard about some so-called “Dairycons” before, and found a group of people having a get-together about a bunch of toys… I had fun, but wasn’t finding any large alien beings walking among the population…

    -Did you *at least* get to try the deep-fried cheese curds? I understand that not everyone knows what they are, but *DAMN* do they taste great!

  2. roadbuster says:

    Lights in the sky. . .wasn’t that a NIN tour?
    Seriously, why does is footage always shaky-cam or blurry? Can we say hoax?

  3. Tiezane says:

    Bummer you wasted your time off, RW, but I have to echo Methusalen’s sentiments and say I appreciate the fact you were willing and able to do that. (I would have gone myself, but my first child is due soon, and the wife barely lets me out of her sight.) I trust about .001% of anything those TRED-heads post. I’m not sure at this point that I even trust that ass-inator or sharky even exist. I think Leo’s just such a lonely little boy, he’s gotta make up “friends” to post things for him, so he looks cooler than he is.

    *WE* know who really knows the truth!

  4. Be Be Umbel says:

    “ass-inator”, lol, I just lubricated myself

    what is this “cheese” of which you speak, and why is there an entire state devoted to it? Are their heads really made of this substance?

    And, don’t take this the wrong way RW, but the term”aerodynamic heat shielding” is an oxymoron. Proper heat shielding is deliberately made to be decidedly UNaerodynamic, otherwise it wouldn’t achieve it’s secondary purpose of slowing the vehicle during atmospheric entry before landing. I would’ve thought you’d have figured that out by now…

  5. @Methusalen: I’ve been to a few Dairycon gatherings. Didn’t see any alien robots per se, but I did see a yellow and black 70s Camaro. That made me wonder a little bit.

    R-W, I hope you at least had the chance to catch a Brewers game and hit a Culver’s. That’s the perfect day for me. Or you could have taken the Miller Brewery tour. From what I hear, they give out free samples.

    @Be Be: LOL! No, our heads really aren’t made of cheese; it is tradition to wear large pieces of foam rubber cheese while watching a Green Bay Packers football game. No, I don’t get it either. I much prefer a good baseball game anyway. (Go Brew Crew!)

    And just what exactly is cheese? Well, if you ever head this way, we’ll happily show you. ;)

    In all seriousness, seeing the pics on TRED did freak me out slightly. Something about that thing just screamed unfriendly. Nice to know I’ve got something like that hovering over my head…

  6. Emkay says:

    I’m torn between GER and TRED.
    Robo-Warrior is quite rude to TRED, but obviously knows what he’s talking about.
    TRED has a friendly atmosphere and usually gets the latest info first, but clearly doesn’t have the knowlege that RW has.

    For now, I’ll check up on TRED for the latest news and trust what GER has to say about it.

  7. You know, I honestly think if TRED and GER were to set aside their differences and work together, we’d be a lot better off. If the two were to come together, just think of what could be accomplished.

    Too bad it probably won’t happen. :(

  8. Methusalen says:

    @Argent: I’d say I’d agree, but I don’t know if the two parties would be able to resolve their differences and opinions. There’d have to be some sort of intermediary that both parties know doing some *serious* mediating to resolve each of their opinions of the other… And even then? I don’t know…

  9. @Methusalen: Yeah, it would take one heckuva peace treaty. Or some Earth-shattering event… and even then I have to wonder.

    Oh well, a girl can hope, can’t she? ;)

  10. Be Be Umbel says:

    who said anything about the Earth being shattered? has there been some report of a discovery of a planet shattering weapon??

  11. @ Be Be: Oh, sorry! I didn’t mean that literally; I meant some really, really big event: ie the government admitting to an alien invasion or the like. No, there’s been no mention of such a weapon. Didn’t mean to worry you. (I’m really sorry about that.)

    Honestly, I really think that if both TRED and GER came together, a lot more good could be done. Having the webmasters sniping at each other does nothing and distracts from what’s really going on. How did the saying go..? Oh yeah: United we stand, divided we fall. We really need to start standing together, or things could fall apart.

  12. Methusalen says:

    @Argent: I have said before that I whole-heartedly agree with the idea that the two (RW & Leo) should join forces; but unfortunately… I think the saying that would be more likely?
    “One shall stand, One shall fall.”

  13. ^ Yeah, you’re probably right. I can’t help but think it sucks, though. =/

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